Today is my 41st birthday, so I thought it appropriate to somehow tie my blog post to a birthday related theme. I had initially thought about outlining various birthday celebrations depicted in the literary world, but my mind wouldn’t budge from the most epic birthday movie ever made.
If you are young enough to have missed out on this epic classic, then you must go to your preferred movie retailer of choice and watch immediately.
As I thought about Sixteen Candles, I got to thinking how a sequel would play out on Sam’s 41st birthday. Here’s how I envision some of the moments from her 16th birthday would link up with her at the age of 41.
“Chronologically you’re sixteen today. Physically, you’re still fifteen.”
At 16, Sam looks in the mirror the morning of her birthday hoping for a dramatic change in appearance. She wants to look like the woman she is becoming, not the child she is leaving behind.
At 41, Sam steps in front of the mirror, eyes closed. She’s afraid to look. She’s no longer hoping to look a year older, but rather praying that the aging has stopped. She takes a deep breath, opens her eyes, and looks in the mirror—instantly she wonders what the hell happened. Her red hair is now infested with strands of gray. Her once pale, smooth complexion is now marked with wrinkles. Her years of eating carrots had eventually paid off, however now she wishes there were a vegetable that would make them stop sagging.
Suddenly, that 15 year old body doesn’t seem so bad after all.
“They forgot my birthday.”
In the original movie, Sam’s entire family forgets that it’s her birthday. Ouch. At 16 she’s disappointed and hurt—as she should be.
At 41, Sam is hoping that people have forgotten her birthday. She’s thinking that maybe if it goes uncelebrated then it won’t really happen. She’d still be 40. But no, her kids are on it. They remember for one simple fact:
Mom’s birthday means they get to eat cake.
“What’s happenin’, hot stuff?”
16 year old Sam is forced to take her grandparent’s exchange student, Long Duk Dong, with her to the school dance. She is not pleased by this and quickly attempts to ditch him.
For her 41st birthday, Sam would like to get a new car. She wants a sporty new BMW, but doesn't want the price tag that goes with it. Long Duk Dong owns the BMW dealership in town, and he's still not over the way she treated him. She's hoping that her lunch date later in the day with his wife, Lumberjack, will smooth things over.
“Am I turning you on?”
The Geek, or Farmer Ted, has a major crush on 16 year old Sam. Although Sam is not interested in the younger geek, she tolerates him—and even lets him borrow her panties for a bet!
At 41, Sam no longer tolerates The Geek’s behavior. He still tries to get that pair of panties back, and he manages to maintain a one-car-distance behind her everywhere she goes. And, even though she changes her phone number every year, The Geek still finds a way to call her to sing, “You say it’s your birthday! Da-na-na-na-na! It’s my birthday too!”
Sam finally recognizes his behavior for what it really is: Stalking. Instead of handing over her panties, she slaps him with a restraining order.
“Make a wish.”
16 year old Sam has a huge crush on Jake Ryan, but he doesn’t know she exists—until he picks up the survey that Sam drops in class. Sam’s answers to the survey questions are enough to make him take notice, and he sets of on a quest to learn more about her. Then he shows up at her house, and her sister’s wedding...
At 41, Sam is happily married to Jake Ryan. He is still just as romantic as he was at 16, and every year they sit on the kitchen table with a cake full of candles between them. However, as each year passes and the number of those candles increases, it’s harder and harder for them to kiss over the cake without catching their clothes on fire.
Any other birthday favorites out there? If so, how would you envision the sequel?