October 2023 Library Events Autopsy

Another quality post brought to you by Steve! 

Hey, everybody!

It's spooky season and you know what that means: live events!  I have been absolutely swamped with events this past month, and I wouldn't want it any other way.  I recorded a video to let you know how my local libraries have hosted three amazing events over the past few weeks.  Check it out!

Awkward Debuts: On 'Beautiful' in The Tomb of Baalberith Volume 2

It's really weird for me to do one of these as I'm not really one for self-promotion. Almost everything I do in the journalism space is about someone else's thing, or some company's newest thing, and rarely - if ever - do I feel free to talk about myself openly. Then again, I've never really had a thing I had to promote. Almost every project or accomplishment I've ever worked on was part of a team or a collaboration with that in mind. The Tomb of Baalberith anthology is very much this sort as well, it’s just, still strange to me to see words I wrote turned into imagery. The campaign was created by my good friend and comics veteran Mark McKenna, along with a cohort of writers and friends such as Jad Kaado and Mark's own son Kyle. 

What's cool about this project is we take on a sort of horror comics of the 50s approach. It's Tales from Crypt-styled horror - though never too much or too little in terms of excess. The story that I'd written is called ‘Beautiful’ with thoughtfully stunning artwork from fellow newcomer Jameson Matunas. To be quite honest,  a good reason why I've been missing posts and such lately is our collaboration, as we've been working on this and talking about collaborating on a bunch of projects together in the future. Safe to say, Jameson is my new artistic partner and together, we plan on unveiling stuff that isn't just about his sexy scratchy art style, or my verbose and often turning the trope on its head style of writing - but rather, we strive to make stories that make a difference to today's world. Which is sort of my goal as a writer and ours as creatives.

We want to make art that doesn't just entertain but actually says something. Tells hard-to-listen to truths about the world and brings it to the forefront of the conversation. 

Why? 

Is because although escapism is nice. Entertainment feels overripe with it right now. The world needs to talk about its issues. So I've made a vow to always write about the truths that never get addressed in conversation and in media. Basically showcase, why the world is so full of gray right now - in an era where everyone has become black and white. Us versus Them.

I want to say in my art that life is complicated.

I want us to do something about it, which is why I write the way I do.

To try and change the world. 

For 'Beautiful', the best way I can describe our short is I wanted to make something with a female demon/monster since the original Baalberith was missing a bit of that. Yet, immediately when I had to think about female demons - I couldn't think of many. Sirens. Maybe. A Gorgon. Possibly. Maybe. Definitely? Something with eyes looking into the heart of your soul. As Souls was a big thing in the original comic.

It was then I thought. Ya know. It would be really cool if I could tell a story about my cataract surgery back in 2013. Basically, what it's like being awake while a doctor slices away at your eyeballs. Because I've done that. I've lived that. Most people would be horrified by the kind of melting orange colors you see that is your puss seeping out of your eye lenses. So I originally went with a Gorgon, and to do so, I thought, well, the original story in Perseus looked into Medusa's gaze... This ugly creature who couldn't see herself. 

Which to be honest... then brought me to the idea of tackling a topic on Beauty. Or BEAUTIFUL which is what I called the story so as to not be confused with the BEAUTY comics by Image creator Jeremy Haun (also a great comic btw).

I thought about it for a while. What if I did a story about modern beauty fanatics? How social media is destroying women's personal body images of themselves - particularly on Instagram. Influencers and girls who are obsessed with selling their looks. I also had a beauty influencer friend from high school that I reconnected with in 2022 named, Jessica DeFino. Who'd kinda gotten famous on Substack talking about Beauty Culture and her days working for the Kardashians...  

Anyway, I knew where this story was going but I really wanted to make sure it didn't come across as misogynistic. I needed to stress what I was doing was empowering and not victimizing this person. So I wanted to make a statement about the culture rather than the subject and talk about the toxic nature of chasing fame and having this become everything you wanted... the real-world problems of when you have a be-all-end-all mentality to anything in life.

I realized soon after that The Gorgon wasn't gonna cut it. The pages I'd written for that, contrasted very hard with the plotting of what I wanted to say in this story (it's kinda hard to make a compelling snake woman story where she's hiding from the world and essentially can't look at anyone, else they turn to stone).

But I had this character that I already made for this named, Brandi. A play on the word 'Brand' and also a bit of a valley girl namesake by ending it with an i. I knew the only way this would work was if she obsessed over her pictures and beautiful images - and then throw in a conflict where we take that away.

To build the horror elements, David Cronenberg's body horror movies came to mind almost immediately. But if not a Gorgon then what else could the monster be?

And it became obvious. A Succubus. 

Though again, I didn't want this to be outright naughty for the sake of selling copies. A lot of people do that in the industry and I don't want to be like other people necessarily - so I needed the story to stand out. The idea was something sexy in terms of imagery but with no nudity. In fact, what if... and bear with me.... what if we did a succubus story without any actual sex involved? Would that even be possible and how could it tie to the mythos established within Volume 1 of this story?

The result is what I ended up writing. However, I can't help but feel uneasy about the launching of this. As I am slowly realizing this is the beginning of a very long journey I've been prepping for a long time. 

I can't deny that I'm a bit fazed. A bit flabbergasted. A bit all over the place regarding the launch. 

Anyway, please do support my first breakthrough into comics. Click the Kickstarter. Pledge a few dollars. Buy a copy, a bottle opener, and a T-shirt. And more importantly: watch our video.

Because I scripted that too.

https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/markinker/the-tomb-of-baalberith-v2

The Perfectly Fine Neighborhood

Hi everyone! I have been absolutely swamped recently. Between work, my own writing, running my website, and working on THE PERFECTLY FINE NEIGHBORHOOD, I haven't had a second to myself! I loved working behind-the-scenes with Steve Kozeniewski and Wile E. Young putting this anthology together though, and I wrote a whole post about a couple of weeks back. Sorry for the redirect, but I am currently a headless chicken - so click on the picture for more details!

I swear, next month I have an original post planned for this blog - love to you all, and HAPPPPYYYY SPOOOOKY SEASON!

If David Attenborough Did a Segment on Fall

Autumn is here.

The once green leaves are now brittle and brown. The air, once ripe and hot, is now crisp and cool. Mosquitos and other biting insects have gone into hiding, while spiders have undoubtedly begun moving into houses to overwinter and lay eggs in the humans' ear canals. Females in sweaters and Ugg boots are slithering out of their burrows to feast upon the bountiful crop of pumpkin spice and apple cider that now flourishes in every coffee shop and bakery. 

And of course, it's almost Halloween, an annual Autumn celebration where the youth of the town hide their identities behind the masks of their favorite superhero or monster. They travel from home to home demanding treats from strangers, a fun reprieve from their usual stance on the subject. They prance about the streets for an our or two at a time, carrying bags and buckets to collect their haul. When they're finished, they gather back at their domiciles to feast. Some of the more rambunctious young will visit homes not to collect treats, but to annoy their neighbors by decorating their homes with eggs and paper.

For the adults, Halloween is a time to show off one's best plumage. Females and males alike often decorate themselves in scanty attire, often themed to look like various animals, professions, and time periods. Many individuals make themselves up to look as intimidating and frightening as possible, in hopes that they will impress their rivals. During Halloween celebrations, adult humans will often imbibe in fermented juices, often overindulging just as their young do on their candy. 

Yes, Autumn is a unique time of year in the human world.

Reminder to Self: Fun Things Are Meant to be Fun

Not gonna lie, I've been in a bit of a funk lately. And by "lately" I mean "since, like, May?" For various reasons... okay, mostly because I overcommitted myself AGAIN... I've plateaued on all my passion activities. Plateaued? More like flatlined.

First, I burned out HARD on writing. My original plan for 2023 was to whip out Flynn Nightsider and the Ire of Inferno in the spring, between editing Brave New Girls stories, and have it out in time for Gen Con in August. Hey, I'd done just that the year before with the second book in the series, Flynn Nightsider and the Shards of Shadow. All I had to do was follow the same timeline as 2022! Easy peasy!

All right, so I also committed to composing a few short stories for various anthologies, but those were little projects. I could just slot them in and still knock out my novel.

Except my brain had other ideas. After constructing an outline I was happy with, I dove head-first into the manuscript and... made it to about Chapter Three before my mind went splat. I'd just stare at the open document and tumbleweeds would blow through my skull. I still managed to hit my short story deadlines—hey, I made a commitment! — but other than that, I just couldn't bring myself to be productive. I ended up rewatching Star Treks Voyager AND Deep Space Nine, then binging a bunch of trash I can't even remember.

Well, this kind of thing has happened before, and I found refuge in my other activities. Activities that I took up to get away from writing. Activities that I was okay with being mediocre at because they were just meant to be an escape.

But a funny thing happens after you've been doing things for a while... you lose perspective. 

Choir was out for the summer, but I was hitting the circus studios whenever I could. And I. Was. Flatlining. Trapeze tricks I'd been working on for a million years weren't getting any better, and in fact some were getting worse (I spent so long trying to clean up my layout that I lost my go-to trick, the split, which I first nailed in 2019). Over on aerial silks, it hit me that moves I was struggling with two years ago (hello, inverted climbs) were still a hot mess that felt nearly impossible. Meanwhile, I watched classmates that had started around the same time as me become more and more advanced.

A big reason for this was that said classmates dedicate a lot more time to what is, for them, a passion. Meanwhile, my training schedule became super sparse thanks to summer travel (turns out you can't reeeeeeally gain strength by climbing a thing once every other week). 

Suffice it to say, I was felt like a loser by the end of summer. And I was determined to get myself back on track after Labor Day.

AND THEN THE PLAGUE HIT. No, not that plague, though I almost wish it had been because it'd be easier to gain sympathy. But it turns out a run-of-the-mill not-pandemic-y virus can still knock you flat (it's hard to do anything when you cough every other breath). That meant goodbye, most of September (also, that's why I missed my last post).

So here I am, up and about again but even further behind, and really feeling like a loser. I finally managed to buckle down and work on some short stories, at least, but Ire of Inferno remains barely written. Current plan: To use NaNoWriMo to kick it into action. But first, must finish short story...

Meanwhile, my physical stamina is at zero, which is a problem when you've signed up for an aerial performance workshop. It means I get winded really easily, and I can't actually manage to string together the moves I want for my piece. Then I get to watch my classmates be awesome while pouting over what I hot mess I am.

Whine, whine, whine, poor me.

Well, wallowing won't do me any good. So instead, I keep reminding myself how all these things I've been feeling like a loser over are meant to be FUN. I started writing stories because it was FUN. I started climbing fabric and swinging from the sky because it was FUN. And it wasn't supposed to matter how "good" I was at any of it.

Sometimes, I wish 2011 Mary were here to remind me that she only wanted to finish a manuscript, never mind if anyone read it.

2019 Mary isn't that far behind, yet apparently I've still forgotten how she was thrilled that she was even allowed onto a flying trapeze, or could climb two feet off the ground unassisted. 

I think it's a natural inclination, especially if you grew up in one of those over-achiever-y households, to think that you must be constantly improving on all things, or else you're falling behind. But that doesn't have to be true... some things are meant to be fun for their own sakes. And hey, what's wrong with a plateau? They can be rather nice!

I'm gonna keep telling myself that while I continue struggling at all the things. At least choir's back in session, and I'm still a decent sight reader.

When it gets to be a slog...

Hey, did you catch that new show? You know, the one all your friends are talking about. The one that they can't stop chatting about in the group text?

Oh yeah. I meant to watch that one, but I was trying to finish the last series they were raving about and then they dropped a whole second season and I got further behind...

Or what about that new book? Your favorite author just released the latest book in your favorite fantasy series!

Um, yeah...I pre-ordered that one... It's on my kindle... I'll get to it...

Hey, did you catch all those movies that just dropped on that streaming service you pay $10 a month for but never watch?

Please leave me alone...

***

Remember, this is supposed to be fun. 

This is supposed to be an age of plenty, where we can decadently select whatever we like to amuse ourselves with for an evening like an emperor idly choosing which servant girl will dance for him. Only now the decadent emperor has thousands of dancing girls to choose from and by the time he picks one he's too tired to relax and enjoy the show. 

Have you had that feeling? A new show comes on, one that seems tailor-made for your preferences, almost like the algorithm pulled it from your subconscious desires, and your first reaction is Ten episodes? I don't have ten free hours...

(The algorithm worked really hard to give you that show about astronaut spies that are also dinosaurs! You made the algorithm cry! YOU WATCH THAT SHOW!)

And of course, it is a running joke among me and my writer friends how long our TBR (To Be Read) lists are. Since I bought a kindle and was introduced to the joy of  Bookbub sales, I have accumulated hundreds of books. (It didn't help that I was a wiz at a sadly defunct online trivia game that paid out prizes in Amazon gift cards.) If I read a book a week, it will take years to get through them all, and that's assuming I don't get any more. Which we all know is not going to happen. My sister in law gave me an Amazon card for my birthday and I promptly bought about 5 more books. On to the pile with you!

And that can all be overwhelming. And stressful! It makes me feel like I'm back in school and have to read some 500 page doorstop for English class and then write a report. (Oh and don't get me started on the whole Review Discourse on Twitter. Look, sometimes I don't feel like writing a damn book report. Just be happy I left a star rating.)

It is depressingly easy for me to forget that reading for pleasure should be pleasurable. 

I have to remind myself constantly, that if I don't finish the library book before it's due? I can renew it. I don't have to try and cram it in. 

If I don't get to that book I bought on sale last year? It's not going anywhere. And the writer will still be happy to get a review whenever I do read it. 

If I don't get to a show? That's ok. There are a lot of shows. I still haven't seen all of Bridgerton Season 2. Or Mad Men (I got the gist, ok? Martinis, ad men, sexism, Christina Hendricks in tight sweaters. Get off my back.) 

I'm trying to cut back. I've dropped a couple streaming services I wasn't watching. Some of those choices were easy. I stopped HBO because their idiot of a CEO wanted to charge me $17 a month to watch him destroy what was once a great service. I really think about clicking "purchase" on those cheap books. I try and check the library first. But mainly, I'm just giving myself permission to relax. 

I'm not worrying about my Goodreads Reading Challenge. I'm just going to read books I like by authors I like and try out a different genre every now and then. (I was reading a romance novel at Barnes & Noble last week, and I liked it! It was sweet! And no one got murdered! So far!)

Honestly, let's all just get off our backs. No one has to write a paper on modernism in short fiction of the 1950s or anything, so just enjoy your book. 

And take me off the group text. I want to stay spoiler free for when I finally watch that show in three years.

I'll get to you yet, Season 2 of Stranger Things...